??????

As I sit in my chair looking out of the window at the mass of grey clouds that are just beginning to form, myriad questions are popping up in my mind. Numero uno – why am I here? The most impulsive answer that springs up my mind is the slogan of a social welfare organization that reads “I exist therefore I am”. Quite true. But what justice am I doing by being here? The only living being I help is the rose plant that we have at home. Apart from that, I frankly feel I’m making no difference to this world at all - maybe because of my lack of contentment. The last time I went to IIT-m, I felt at home after a long time amidst a hundred plus scholars. That moment, I felt that is where I belong. But what justice am I doing to my company? Not that I’m brilliant or I make things work in a flick, but I know I’m not putting in my full efforts here. And I very well know, that even if I leave this job and pursue a PhD, I’d miss something else. Am I being humane or am I lacking something? There are numerous occasions when I have felt pressurized and broken down to the four walls that surround me. Am I being immature?

Hope time answers these questions.

Cheers,

Hopie.