A new world turns three today. A world that changed our lives, our perspectives. A world where we have the opportunity to be a toddler all over again, and act by instincts than judgements. A world where we draw breath and believe strongly in hope. A world where biology means nothing and there is just infinite inclusion. A world that keeps reminding us that miracles happen.
Together, lets celebrate three years of life in this world.
Forever in gratitude,
Hopie
I wish to talk about some numbers today. Did Shakespeare ever write about them? Or was he content with his perspective of names? Well numbers always deceive me and I wonder why. The most talked-of ones precisely. Waist and Weight. If I plot time against one of those, my graph would soar higher than the growth rate of India that our honble PM has been incessantly publishing the last days. No exaggeration here. Should I call it a mid-life growth-spurt?
This morning, with my strict low calorie diet, i ate what would translate to 2kg of body mass. Chapathi sugar and ghee. The eating was enlightening and it indeed did take me back to my childhood days. But then the numbers? I have been switching sizes like crazy the last years. And I am very elated at this point, that on continuing such a diet as mentioned, I have successfully managed to step into my husband's... well night pants. Ye they fit me so perfectly! And I dont even have to use the tie string! I am glad I have moved on in life... from sharing a wardrobe with my sister to sharing a wardrobe with my husband.
Back to numbers. Like Bella tells Edward "we're the same temperature now"; after eight years of marriage, I can utter the same romantic dialogue to prem. But on waist sizes. And in Fahrenheit please.
Three cheers to will power,
Hopie
So back to routine after sometime. Its noon time, time for cookers and cooking. Im totally occupied with all four burners on and zonked out as to which has salt and which doesn't. I try to taste one by one and finally find out when I hear a sniff from the hall. I am now trained tp recognize different toddler calls, which ones are safe, what means crisis and when I would find Tarzan there. The sniff is an emergency and it was Avyukth. I rush to him and he points to his ear. Its bleeding (ok not so much) and with my out-of-the- kitchen brain I immediately apply turmeric and reassure him urgently because I could smell burnt food. It was the cauliflower. I run inside and remove it and continue to complete the rest (in a hopefully more optimal manner) when Akshath walks in. They still cannot differentiate first and third person when they talk. Akshath blurts "amma unakku ears la manja podi podlaama". I recall my meditation lessons, switching the sambar to sim, wash my hands and in the worst parenting lesson ever possible, apply turmeric to his ear. He checks with his hands, its gooey, he's happy and runs out. Finally. I continue and in a minute Avyukth walks in. "Amma unakku ears la perunkayam podlaama?". I close my eyes as my brain fights between anger and laughter. And laugh.
Thank god its thursday.
Cheers,
Hopie
So i just go for bath. Yeah a normal affair. The boys r playing with prem. Normal. No stress. I lock d bathroom door, and start having my bath when i hear Akshath saying kakka vadhdha. And i hear prem interrogating him instead of rushing him to the toilet. Doesnt he understand its s.o.s.?? And it has taken months of stress for me t achieve this. I open my mouth to shout (from inside the loo) and prem finally takes him. So he is sitting in d potty chair. Whew. And avyukth and prem are chatting. Ok so far. Akshath is chanting kakka vadhdha which is a good sign as the baby should probably be in breach now. Now i hear some laughter from avyukth and prem. Now what sort of a nonsense is this? Dont they understand how serious this business is? Isnt a baby trying to poo there?? More laughter (and yes my breath is getting heavier). And now i hear akshath's voice too. Thats it. He's not going to poo anymore and prem asks "hey hes taking forever, shall i put his diapers on?". I want to shout its his fault and i keep calm. I ask him to decide. What?? Shouldnt he be made to pee? And i shout asking him to. So akshath is now sitting on the chair i guess with prem and avyukth cheering him to "fulla po". And there are claps. i close my eyes and wipe myself dry (what feels like an endlessly long and stressful bath) and thats when it hit me - had peed until the last drop?? Or had prem put his diapers on after the first jet? By the time i come out the party has shifted to the last room playing some games that Tarzan would enjoy. Wait a minute. Is avyukth sitting too much along the edge.
Heck. I am exhausted. And the over obsessive monster in me must die.
Cheers,
Hopie
Those fluttering dragon flies, the pair of them, do they sing a song? Or perhaps tell us a story or more? Of dark clouds, of heavy winds, of high tides and lows, of rainbows, of darkness and light.. they flutter with a rhythm, pecking walls, in perfect sync to each other, no they dont hold hands, they fly, oblivious to the darkness around, to the light drizzle, to the heavy cloud. Perhaps the loud thunder is music to them, is that the rhythm they dance to? And lo, the bright lighnting, a trick to reveal the secret they carry, the twinkle in their eyes. I watch them in awe as the drops become heavier. I am transfixed, mesmerized, more words do not flow. The drops now hold hands, and start a new rhythm. A rhythm so carefully choreographed by the dark clouds. Of broken promises, of shattered dreams, of regrets, of guilt, of those moments that pass without words. The rain wipes away all sin, cleansing all around, watering new hope, painting the perfect rainbow. The dragonflies camouflage in a cozy corner, perhaps watching me, perhaps aware this time, aware of the tears that flow ceaselessly, seamlessly, and fly around me, singing a reasurring buzz.
We put our faith in you dear dragonflies.
Cheers,
Hopie
Dear Husband of mine,
after eight years of marriage, i feel very sad that you still dont understand, that the potti is an integral part of us. I have waited for you to accept, but you are forever in denial, arent you? The potti is with us. It has to be full.
Please understand we have happy memories filling it. We walk along long familiar corridors, picking up scents from nearby shops, of perfumes, of bakes, of coffee, of soaps. We look at young couples and realise how old we've grown (filling infinite potti-s meanwhile) and how we're absolutely a generation behind. We spot familiar things, and talk of old memories, with a smile so inconspicuous and oblivious to the world around.
Of course it is always going to be heavy. There is no equation to the weight of the potti. It is neither directly nor inversely proportional to the frequency of visits or to the distance back home. And without any doubt you have to carry it. Period.
To conclude, i wish to say, that a full potti indeed is a sign of propesperity. And even before you ask, it so obviously is, of yours.
Please grow up and embrace the potti. It comes with us.
Cheers,
Hopie
This morning, my mom reminded me tht it was friendship day. How times change. I recollected the days of celebration we had together. Those meaningless gifts, those friendship bands, day out, the times together. I realised this morning, how old ive become, so old that ive forgotten that its friendship day. One thing im glad about is, i have you to grow old with. Happy friendship day!!
The last weeks, I've been put up with perhaps the worlds most toughest challenge. The question might look far too simple to you, but hearing these answers makes me realise how far I am from my goal.
Me : What is your name?
Akshath : Mia
Akshath akshath akshath. I utter the name thrice in each of their ears much like the tradition of punyavachanam. And give it a go again
Me : What is your name?
Avyukth : Vulture (thats the t shirt he was wearing).
I roll my eyes in disbelief.
Once more.
Me : What is your name?
Avyukth : inoonu akshath
What?
Me : What is your name?
Avyukth : two akshath.
Me : ok akshath, What is your name?
Akshath : two Avyukth
Ok. The last time.
Me : what is your name?
Akshath : sebamed
I give up. Henceforth I switch to teaching them Shakespeare, which is perhaps a lot less complex.
"What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet."
And as for the name itself? Well I'm planning to buy badges.
Cheers,
Hopie
You carried us, not in your tummies, but in your hearts;
You nurtured us, not through mere touch but through your affection;
You fought with us, not by our side, but by your prayers;
You grow up with us, learning the language we speak;
You defy biology and you teach us, a mother is not just the womb, a mother is infinite love.
Wish you a happy mother's day Ma. We will learn to love from you.
Cheers,
Two Little Hopies
The boys have been able to identify colours for months (although I claim no credit) and I don't miss a chance to flaunt it. But then, they truly know how to put me back in place. The other day we were visiting a neighbour and they were quite astonished that they named a few objects with colours in their place. The old man of the house stepped forward to test. "So which other colours do you know kanna..." Avyukth : Amma colour brown. I should seriously have walked off after this statement but no. And for that split second decision, I truly deserved what followed. Akshath : Amma whisker black.
Yeah I think I might pass for a primate right now.
Cheers,
Hopie
